Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a funny thing. It’s actual meaning is just about the total opposite of what we, as humans, think it is. Merriam Webster defines forgiveness as: 1) to give up resentment of or claim to requital, 2) to grant relief from payment of, or 3) to cease to feel resentment against (an offender). Basically saying to “let go.” Our definition of the word, and in our minds, we think it means to “forcibly forget” or just say it’s “okay” when someone has either wronged or hurt you. We think it means to sweep the anger, the hurt, and the disrespect under the rug to allow that person or person to do it again at will. That mentality couldn’t be further from the truth of what forgiveness actually means.
The Bible tells us repeatedly to forgive others. Colossians 3:13 tells to “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” So basically what God is telling us is that if you’re holding something against someone you should drop it and let it go. At the end of the day, and at the end of your life, the only person that bitterness and anger are hurting is you. I’m struggling with this myself because the very people who are closest to me hurt me and disrespect me on a daily basis. I tend to hold it in and let it fester and then it comes spewing out in either my bad attitude or in actions unbecoming of me. It’s not a good thing at all only leading to walls going back up or canyons being built between people that may or may not ever get bridged. That is no way to live if you want to be happy and/or healthy.
Ephesians 4:31-32 says to “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ God forgave you.” Yep, there’s that word “forgiveness” again. It’s all over the Bible so we should discern that God was serious about letting go of negative feelings toward others. Jesus even makes it abundantly clear in Matthew 18:21-22 “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, NOT seven times, but seventy-seven times,” which in laymen’s terms means “as many as it takes.” Pretty simple when you read it but when it actually comes to doing it, it’s almost dang near impossible. Why? Ego and pride get in the way and then stubbornness comes in closely behind and before you know it people aren’t speaking to one another and the Devil’s smiling because tribulation and turmoil are taking place in the family. One of my favorite scriptures reminds us of how much Satan hates us. John 10:10 states, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy, I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly.” I love that scripture. God doesn’t want us to live in a state of agitation or tension. He sent his only Son to die on the cross for us so that we would have eternal life of abundance and joy. We’ve missed the mark if we live otherwise.
The next time someone’s actions or attitude show disrespect toward you or someone’s words hurt your feelings remember who is FOR you and not AGAINST you. Remember who you belong to and then pray through it and then forgive that person…”forgive them; for they know not what they do.” It sounds easy, I know. Trust me when I say that I am working on this myself. In the end, it’s our relationship with God that matters the most. We can’t control others or their actions. We can only control OUR actions and mindset. If we can try and BREATHE in those moments that really piss us off, then we’ll be able to rationally and calmly take control of our emotions and react the way God expects us to. Disciplining ourselves by practicing the “pause” will keep us on the path that we’re trying so hard to stay on. Remember that God will make others accountable for actions toward others. You don’t need to worry about. He’s got your back and he’s got mine. Forgiveness is about love…love of God, love of others, and love of self. Don’t hold onto those things that keep your insides in chaos. Forgive and like a balloon, full of helium, that’s just slipped from your grasp…let it go and watch it fade above the clouds, never to be seen again.
“Today is the day the Lord hath made; rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24 (another favorite)
Kelly :
